Reluctantly Willing

Xiu Yijian hurriedly packed up her belongings. She couldn’t stand living here anymore. What kind of crappy place was this? Everyone just tried to piss her off!

“Auntie, are you leaving?” Guo Guo asked the furious Xiu Yijian, still clutching the cat.

“Are you blind? Just take care of your cat!”

When she got to the door, she happened to run into Gu Jun and An Xiaoyan who’d just returned. After bringing the cat here, Gu Jun brought An Xiaoyan to the pool. An Xiaoyan’s hair was still dripping wet. His head was lowered so Xiu Yijian couldn’t see his expression.

“You’re leaving?”

Xiu Yijian had been here for so long that they were used to her now. She was just an extra person at mealtimes. Gu Jun didn’t care, but he didn’t understand why she was leaving now.

“I’m leaving. I don’t want to stay here anymore.”

“Just don’t say I forced you to leave.”

Xiu Yijian stared hard at Gu Jun and then started to pull her suitcase away. She’d only taken a step when An Xiaoyan grabbed her.

“Miss Xiu, you should stay. If there’s something wrong, just say it. Mr. Gu won’t ignore the problem.” In An Xiaoyan’s opinion, Xiu Yijian was Gu Jun’s best marriage candidate. At the very least, she treated Guo Guo well.

An Xiaoyan’s care seemed fake to Xiu Yijian. “You still can’t tell?”

“Miss Xiu, what do you mean?”

Xiu Yijian shook An Xiaoyan’s hand away. “I told you that he likes you, okay?”

“Miss Xiu, don’t joke. Mr. Gu likes you.”

Seeing An Xiaoyan’s behavior, Gu Jun separated them and dragged An Xiaoyan into the house. Xiu Yijian was left outside.

“Mr. Gu, Mr. Gu, Miss Xiu is leaving…” An Xiaoyan said, looking behind to Xiu Yijian who was getting further away.

“What does that have to do with me?!” Gu Jun cared more about An Xiaoyan’s feelings. Why did An Xiaoyan keep pushing him out? Couldn’t he try to keep Gu Jun around him or believe him just once?

With a thud, Gu Jun pressed An Xiaoyan against the wall. The door was already locked. In the large room, their breathing was abnormally clear.

“What’s wrong?”

“You don’t feel anything at all?”

“Mr. Gu, feel—”

He couldn’t finish. The second part of his sentence was stopped by Gu Jun’s kiss. The weight of his body successfully trapped An Xiaoyan under him.

Hiss…

His lip was bitten and it hurt. An Xiaoyan’s arm weakened against Gu Jun.

“An Xiaoyan, you really don’t understand?”

“Mr. Gu, are you talking about what Miss Xiu said?”

“An Xiaoyan, I know you don’t believe her.” With that, he grabbed An Xiaoyan’s right hand and stuffed it onto his right chest. “Feel it.”

An Xiaoyan’s right hand was pressed against Gu Jun’s heart. Under the silent atmosphere, he could feel it pounding.

“Do you feel that? It’s only that fast when I’m around you.”

“Mr. Gu, you’re too nervous.”

Gu Jun stopped An Xiaoyan’s hand before it shrunk back. “No, it’s only that fast around the one I like. So do you believe me now?”

An Xiaoyan’s head shook like a paddle. He couldn’t believe it. This was all fake and unreal.

“An Xiaoyan, I like you so much. Just believe me.”

Gu Jun’s hot breath hit An Xiaoyan’s pale and fearful face. His glasses fogged up from the steam. Fat teardrops fell down. Gu Jun didn’t know what to do. An Xiaoyan only cried when he was disappointed. Why was he crying now?

“Don’t cry. Did I scare you?”

An Xiaoyan cried in Gu Jun’s arms for a while. The cries gradually grew softer. Finally, he went limp in Gu Jun’s arms.

Steady breaths sounded.

He’d fallen asleep.

Gu Jun brought An Xiaoyan to the bed and put on the blankets. He sat on the bedside and studied An Xiaoyan’s sleeping figure while thinking back on his actions.

Had he been too impatient?

It was like a string that was pulled taut every second of the day. If someone suddenly cut it, the sudden moment of relaxation would be hard to take.

An Xiaoyan was probably like that. It was hard to imagine one’s enemy suddenly becoming his lover. Probably no one could accept that.

Gu Jun had to admit that he was too impatient, but he really didn’t want An Xiaoyan to fear him so much. An Xiaoyan flinched no matter what and never dared to look at him straight-on. He wished An Xiaoyan could stand beside him, hold onto his shoulder, and playfully say, “This is my boyfriend.”

Right now, they were barely closer than acquaintances.

The man on the bed furrowed his brows. Gu Jun caressed the wrinkles on the forehead, wanting to erase them.

Oh, when would he be able to capture An Xiaoyan’s heart? It always felt so hard. If he searched for the reason, it was because he’d been too over-the-top before, even forcing An Xiaoyan to the point of suicide.

“Daddy…” Guo Guo sprawled at the door, looking at the people inside.

Gu Jun walked over. He brought Guo Guo out of the room and closed the door.

“What’s wrong?”

“Hungry. Wanna eat.”

Gu Jun checked the time. It was almost seven. Time passed really quickly.

“Tell the nanny to cook dinner. I’ll watch TV with you.”

“Okay.”

Gu Jun holed up on the couch with Guo Guo. The cat was beside him too. Guo Guo focused on the TV.

“Guo Guo, do you think Daddy likes Uncle An?”

“Of course.”

“Why?”

“Because you only sleep in the same bed with someone you like.”

Gu Jun frowned slightly. Who said these things to a kid? “Guo Guo, don’t say these things in the future. Sleeping in the same bed doesn’t mean anything.”

“No, Auntie Xiu said so. She said that Daddy likes Uncle An, so you sleep with Uncle An every day. You sleep with me because you like me too, but Daddy likes Uncle An more now. That’s why you spend more time with Uncle An.”

All the “liking” confused Gu Jun, but he felt that Guo Guo did make sense.

“Daddy will start pursuing Uncle An from now on. You have to help me, or else Uncle An will leave.”

“I want to help Uncle An!”

The kid’s determined tone made Gu Jun feel helpless. He could only see as he went.

Dinner was done cooking, but An Xiaoyan still hadn’t come down. Gu Jun sat at the table but kept looking upstairs.

“Daddy, I’ll go call Uncle An.”

Before Guo Guo could move, Gu Jun stopped him. “Don’t move. Eat your food. Finish this glass of milk before I’m back.”

Gu Jun carried the dinner plate and crept upstairs. He hesitated at the door, but he still pushed it open. He thought that An Xiaoyan was still sleeping, but An Xiaoyan was sitting up in his bed, which startled him.

“Uh, here’s your dinner.”

The powerful aura was completely gone. Only caution remained.

An Xiaoyan had been sitting for a long time. He’d thought about many things. From their first meeting at the hospital four years ago to now, too many things had happened. He couldn’t remember most of it, but the feelings within him revolved around pain, especially recollecting what has happened in the bedroom.

Now that Gu Jun said all this, he felt like he was in a black hole. He couldn’t feel any support under him.

“Mr. Gu, I know you were kidding today. From today on, I’ll be even more careful. I won’t anger you or Guo Guo. I won’t anger anyone in the Gu family.”

With that, he moved the blankets to get off bed. As soon as his hand touched the blanket, Gu Jun pressed down on him.

“An Xiaoyan, I’m being serious.”

“Mr. Gu.”

Gu Jun lifted An Xiaoyan’s clothes and touched the smooth skin. He could only express his love to An Xiaoyan like this. Words were so powerless.

“Mr. Gu, wait. I’ll take the clothes off. Don’t dirty them.”

Gu Jun stopped An Xiaoyan’s movements. He grabbed An Xiaoyan’s hand and dragged it down until it touched something hard and hot. A warm breath continued to blow against An Xiaoyan’s face.

“I get turned on just by looking at you.”

“That’s normal. Mr. Gu, anyone would be like that.”

“No, An Xiaoyan. Only you.”

“Mr. Gu, I’m not gay.”

“I’m not either, but I became that way after I met you. Don’t move. Let me hug you like this for a while.”

An Xiaoyan stiffened. Every cell in him was nervous, fearing what Gu Jun would do next. After a long while, the heat on Gu Jun cooled. An Xiaoyan’s body relaxed as well.

“Let’s eat.”

An Xiaoyan looked at Gu Jun. He was about to accept the food when Gu Jun brought a spoon to his lips.

“Mr. Gu.”

“Eat.”

If this happened when he was still sick, An Xiaoyan wouldn’t suspect anything. He’d just think that Gu Jun was pitying him and giving him a brief respite from his torment. However, the ambiguity had cleared now and An Xiaoyan didn’t know what it really meant.

“Is it good?”

Gu Jun had specially brought over porridge. Though it was porridge, it actually had a thick broth made out of a hen, crab, and lobsters. It didn’t look like much, but it was rich and flavorful.

The bowl of porridge was quickly emptied. After An Xiaoyan consumed it obediently, Gu Jun smiled. He took out a tissue and carefully wiped An Xiaoyan’s mouth.

“Rest now or read a book. I’ll go down now.”

He was really so gentle—gentle to the point that An Xiaoyan couldn’t believe this was Gu Jun. Was this real?

Gu Jun sat in the library. His mood improved while thinking of An Xiaoyan’s actions. He’d expressed the feelings that he’d always kept hidden. No matter what, his burden had lifted.

The night sky was covered with stars. The stars in the sky sparkled. His heart sparkled too.

Things were never as simple as one imagined. Gu Jun had only taken the first step. There were still many things for him to do.