Reluctantly Willing

When the two came out, it was already noon. Time for lunch.

“Anything you want to eat?”

“No. Mr. Gu, you can order what you’d like. I’m okay with everything.”

“What did you like to eat before?”

What did “before” mean? During university, in jail, or after he left jail?

“Not much.”

Gu Jun knew that An Xiaoyan had something on his mind. One day, he would make a smile reappear on An Xiaoyan’s face.

Chen Chen was buried in work at the office. It was Monday but his boss didn’t come to work, tiring him, the assistant, out. He didn’t know what was with Gu Jun these days. He would be late occasionally and sometimes not even notify him before disappearing.

What did you want to eat the most when you first started working?

The random message confused Chen Chen. He read it carefully many times. Gu Jun really had sent it. He didn’t know what the point was, but he still thought back carefully.

When he’d first started working, his salary had been low. He’d just graduated from university too, so there was a lot that he wanted to eat. He’d probably wanted to eat fish and meat the most.

Seeing the “fish and meat” on his phone, Gu Jun was annoyed. An Xiaoyan ate very little back at home. He had to put a lot of food on An Xiaoyan’s plate and made sure he ate it all. Gorging on meat wasn’t very possible.

In the end, Gu Jun had no choice, and brought An Xiaoyan to a restaurant that he often went to. It was a high-class restaurant. Many rich people chose to eat there.

It was lunch time, so there were a lot of people. Thankfully, there were still seats.

Gu Jun brought An Xiaoyan toward the room upstairs. Many of the people knew Gu Jun. An Xiaoyan followed behind him. His hair was different and his temperament was different than what the rumors online suggested, but a lot of people still pointed at him.

“Ignore them.” Gu Jun instinctively held An Xiaoyan’s waist and pushed him up the stairs.

Just as they reached the second floor, two familiar people walked over from the other side of the hall. The four saw each other and all stopped.

An Xiaoyan didn’t know the man and woman across from him. The man had his arm around the woman’s waist. They were either dating or married.

“It’s so rare to see you. Oh, you brought An Xiaoyan for a meal?” Gu Jing’s words were mocking.

Gu Jun protectively put An Xiaoyan behind him. “You seem to be in a good mood too.”

“How about we eat together?”

Gu Jun was about to refuse when Gao Shan took the lead. “Gu Jun, that won’t be good. You should let Xiaoyan meet his sister-in-law.”

Gu Jun really didn’t want An Xiaoyan to face the rivalries within the circle of wealthy families, but it seemed that they couldn’t escape it today.

“Fine. Let’s eat together.”

Gu Jing and Gao Shan walked in front; Gu Jun followed behind. After the two entered, he whispered in An Xiaoyan’s ear telling him to not worry about anything and just eat lunch.

Gu Jing had just gotten married to Gao Shan and also received the Gao family’s support. He was practically glowing.

“An Xiaoyan seems different from before,” Gao Shan said with an ambiguous smile.

An Xiaoyan noticed the mockery in her voice, but he didn’t say anything. He kept his head lowered.

Gu Jun grasped An Xiaoyan’s hand under the table. He wanted to remind An Xiaoyan that there was nothing to worry about. He was there.

The dishes were served one by one. The four hadn’t eaten, so they ate first. Gao Shan placed food directly onto Gu Jing’s plate, her smile never faltering.

Despite the smile, Gu Jing felt pity inside. He knew what kind of person he was. He would do anything to get what he wanted. If Gao Shan was with him, she was definitely at a disadvantage.

No matter how bad Gu Jun was, at least he was genuine towards An Xiaoyan.

After they ate their fill, the conversation returned to the previous topic.

“Gu Jun, I heard that you were with Miss Xiu earlier and she even stayed in your home. How come this An Xiaoyan is still here?”

“None of your business.”

Actually, Gu Jing’s words resonated with An Xiaoyan. He suddenly asked himself why he was still in the Gu’s home.

“An Xiaoyan drives Guo Guo to school now. What, I can’t hire a driver?”

Sudden laughter filled the entire room. Covering her mouth, Gao Shan said, “This is my first time hearing somebody hire a murderer and enemy as a driver. Gu Jun, no offense, but you’re really open-minded. You’re not even scared that you might get killed one day.”

The sound of glass cut her off. The room fell silent as a low masculine voice slowly uttered, “How dare you speak of him like that?”

“Gu Jun, I’m telling the truth. I know you don’t like to hear it, but you can’t forget his identity. You’re not living in the Gu home anymore, but you’re still part of the family. At the very least, you can’t embarrass the family. You don’t even know how bad the rumors were.”

Gu Jun couldn’t bear to keep listening. He grabbed An Xiaoyan and ran out of the room, not stopping to catch a breath until they were outside, under the sunlight.

An Xiaoyan had been dragged out, so he was even more out of breath. Seeing the red face and unsteady breathing, Gu Jun hugged An Xiaoyan tightly. Laughing, he said, “I’m sorry for making you feel bad.”

“Mr. Gu, I don’t mind. Don’t worry. I’ll drive Guo Guo to school nicely every day.”

He was like an angel who smiled beautifully even when his wings were wet with blood. However, Gu Jun’s heart was the one that hurt. If he were stronger, An Xiaoyan wouldn’t have to suffer and be gossiped about.

“Mr. Gu, let’s go home,” An Xiaoyan suggested softly. “Guo Guo must be worried.”

Gu Jun let go of An Xiaoyan. Concealing his expression, he drove back.

Along the way, they passed by a hamburger restaurant. He stopped to buy a hamburger and fries. He always saw young people eating this, so he thought that An Xiaoyan would like it too. After all, An Xiaoyan was four years younger.

A steamy and delicious-tasting hamburger was stuffed into An Xiaoyan’s lap. He couldn’t believe it. Somehow, Gu Jun’s care made him feel unsettled.

“Eat. I saw that you didn’t eat much earlier. Eat more.” Gu Jun looked forward. “You can only work when you’re full. This way, people won’t say that I mistreat people.”

“Thank you, Mr. Gu.”

An Xiaoyan sat in his seat and chewed on the hamburger. He’d never eaten this stuff before. He liked the sour and sweet taste and even carefully licked the salad dressing on the wrapper. He glanced at Gu Jun while licking. He was relieved when he was sure Gu Jun wasn’t looking.

His tongue licked at the remnants on the wrapper as well as Gu Jun’s heart. He didn’t expect that An Xiaoyan would like this taste. He couldn’t help but smile.

After finishing, An Xiaoyan folded the wrapper neatly and placed it on his leg. At a red light, Gu Jun reached over and tossed the wrapper on the dashboard. His entire body seemed to be shocked by electricity when his hand brushed the man’s pants. It was numb and tingling.

“Are you full?”

An Xiaoyan nodded in response.

A long silence followed. Gu Jun kind of missed the person from last year who would fight back, point and yell at him, and even use his fists and feet when in panic. He was different from this zombie who only said, “yes,””okay,” and “thank you.”

“An Xiaoyan, would you hit me if I give you the chance?”

“Mr. Gu, there’s no need to test me like this. I won’t.”

No matter what, everything was a test or challenge.

He didn’t want An Xiaoyan like this. A feeling of endless guilt ballooned in Gu Jun’s heart. If he were given another year, he wished that he could turn An Xiaoyan back to how he’d been. The four years in jail hadn’t destroyed him, but that one year of hatred had thrown him into a bottomless abyss.

“Mr. Gu, the light is green. Let’s go.”

Gu Jun snapped back to reality. He drove the car into the traffic.

Home wasn’t as quiet as he’d expected. Xiu Yijian sat on the sofa while Guo Guo lay on the tatami nearby, watching TV. When An Xiaoyan returned, he hurried over to latch onto An Xiaoyan’s leg and ask for a hug.

“Where did you go?” Xiu Yijian asked.

Gu Jun’s head hurt whenever he saw this woman. She was like a fly that wouldn’t get swatted away. He couldn’t explain it to Old Mr. Gu if he forced her away, but seeing her everywhere was so annoying.

“None of your business.”

“I’m just asking. Why are you angry?”

An Xiaoyan thought about what Gu Jing had said and reported honestly, “Got a haircut for me.”

“Bring the kid upstairs!” Gu Jun was upset. An Xiaoyan wasn’t Xiu Yijian’s servant. Why did he have to tell her everything?

“Daddy meanie,” Guo Guo said, pouting. Tugging An Xiaoyan’s hand, he went upstairs. “Hmph, Uncle An, Daddy is mean. Let’s ignore him.”

Children knew clearly what was right and what was wrong. This was why they spoke without thinking.

“Guo Guo is really brave with his words.”

Gu Jun didn’t know if this was a praise or insult. Either way, it made him uncomfortable.

“It still has nothing to do with you. When are you leaving? You can’t keep staying in my house.”

“I’ll stay until Old Mr. Gu thinks we’re a thing and don’t need to be restricted by proximity.”

“So you want to stay here your entire life!”

Looking at the back side of the duo going up the stairs, Xiu Yijian wanted to say, I don’t want to stay here and see an emotionless guy, a dead fish, and annoying kid all day.

“Uncle An, I heard a servant say at noon that the auntie wants to be my stepmom. Is that true?”

“Yes. When she gets together with your dad, you’ll have a little brother or sister too.”

Tears rolled out of wide innocent eyes. An Xiaoyan didn’t know what to do. Guo Guo had always been obedient. It was rare for him to start crying like this.

“Don’t cry. Tell me what’s wrong,” An Xiaoyan comforted while wiping Guo Guo’s chubby cheeks with a tissue.