My Servant System

648 Chapter 647: Grasping at the Fleeting

After a few rounds of 'experiments' with my more than willing Vampire partner, I managed to get...

Nothing.

I could feel the threads of pleasure tingling around in my body, but grasping them did one of three things, and they had a range of effects going from really, really bad to really, really good.

The first was neutral; when I tried to grasp the threads of pleasure, they curiously wrapped around my own mana and inspected me, before slithering away and hiding from me, like they were shy animals wary of whether I would cause them harm or not.

It was, again, entirely neutral and mildly infuriating for me, since I could feel what I needed to with them as I grasped them, and it was the most common response I got.

The second was sheer, and complete euphoria of the highest degree; I grasped the threads and pleasure rocked my body, completely overtaking my mind and making me writhe in such rapturous pleasure that I lost myself to it, unable to think about anything besides the thing inside me and the warmth of my lover on my body.

Each thrust, each spurt of her love made me go insane with lust, and it was only when it wore off that I could feel myself again, feel like I was whole and... and here; that I was tangible and real.

That was a scary feeling to go through, but at least it felt great to be forcefully sunk into that euphoria; to be submerged in lust and allowed to go through such rapture.

It wasn't as scary as the last response that I got, one that truly scared me whenever I felt it.

I went numb, completely and utterly numb to the world, to the sex I was having, and numb to life. 

Everything I was feeling was sapped from my body, and I would go from moaning and enjoying myself to just... empty and cold, completely uncaring of the fact that I suddenly left my partner devoid of the responses that she needed, that she wanted from me; in fact, I was uncaring of the woman who was so desperately clinging to me, wanting to show me her love and the depths of her lust.

That was something that - when I finally clawed out of that hellish, dismal pit - made me feel so scared and horrified as I would lay there, unable to comprehend a world where I just... felt nothing.

Cared for nothing.

But, just like Cali had shown me before, Lust Mana was a double edged, incredibly dangerous sword that could overwhelm you with pleasure or sap it away entirely.

That was it's source of power, and that was what made it so utterly terrifying to go against; this was what made me desire it so much, and what made me realize just how utterly insane it was.

It was why I wanted it, to the point that I subjected myself to this torture continuously as I alternated between moaning like a common whore to being entirely cold turkey, worse than a pillow princess.

I had to give Leone an explanation after the first time it happened, the Vampire almost becoming devastated as I went from such intense passion to nothing, worrying that she had done something wrong or that I was faking it.

Upon hearing my explanation though, Leone tried to ask me to stop before relenting and settling for a rhythmic pace that would give me both pleasure and be tame enough that I could still focus.

So I returned to my studying even as I laid beneath my lover, trying my best to focus on grasping those threads of pink mana that lingered in my loins with each thrust.

My first idea that I had after feeling those experiences seemed to be the correct one; I needed to gather the threads into a bundle and guide them to my Core, where I could assimilate them into my own mana and begin harvesting and utilizing it in my own spells.

The problem was that the mana was so sensitive that if I wasn't gentle enough, it would 'flee' from my grasp, but if I wasn't controlling it enough it would slip away as well, so I needed to strike a balance.

The other problem with it was that if I was too strict it would force one of the two extremes upon me, and finding that balance was difficult.

I was a tad concerned that Cali was joking with me and that mortals couldn't grasp such a strong mana type naturally, but again she had sworn it all on Reincantra, so...

Which meant that there was a level of finesse to this that I wasn't capable of having at the moment, or perhaps I just needed to familiarize myself with it some more before I could truly make any progress.

What I did know was that I lowered the amount of times I was too strict with the mana, meaning I wasn't experiencing any sort of high highs or low lows that were discombobulating as often now, though there were a few times where I found myself slipping and wanting to experience those high highs even more.

It was addicting to enter that state of utter orgasmic rapture that I was provided with, though I made sure to restrain myself since getting accustomed to such euphoria would render my normal pleasure obsolete, ruining me as a person; if I needed to chase even bigger thrills to feel something, I wouldn't be me anymore.

So I made sure to keep fine tuning the way I was corralling the mana and tried my best to focus past the constant, steady, great thrusts of Leone as the Vampire made love to me, occasionally forgetting that I was doing 'very important research' and just losing herself to me, which was perfectly fine in my book.

What wasn't fine was when Jahi returned to the room covered in sweat, the Demoness freezing as she saw us before stripping and joining in, making it impossible for me to focus anymore and instead forcing me to give in to the pleasure.

Even though I didn't understand just what I was doing and what I needed to do, I was making progress in the right direction, and I had a feeling that Lust Mana would come to me naturally eventually.

Until that point though, I had enough that I needed to make progress with; my Ice Mana, my physical prowess, and my abilities as an Enchanter.

Whilst I didn't take that class, I could more than definitely continue to improve to a formidable degree in that field as well...

All of those things took time though, and it was a hope of mine that I would have the time needed to become just that much stronger...

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