I Will Disappear, Grand Duke

"Isn't the Grand Duke also a member of the Imperial Family? We can't leave the protection of His Majesty's safety to a single knightly order."

Fernan looked pityingly at the Crown Prince who was insistently persuading him. It was the same for both the emperor and his son to try to put pressure on him in this way. Being annoying seemed to be hereditary, too.

“Well, then, please consider it positively, Grand Duke.”

Fernan left the reception room, ignoring the Crown Prince's last words. He felt bad because the meeting had gone longer than expected.

Returning home, he immediately took off his uniform and strode to the dressing room.

Then he suddenly felt a strange presence and stopped and turned his head. A small person lying on the couch came straight into his field of vision.

Fernan squinted and approached the sofa. Through her disheveled light brown hair, he could see the face of a woman who was asleep.

“Ha.”

Fernan, who confirmed that the woman was Julia, let out a small laugh.

What on earth was she up to in a room without the master? He stared down at Julia, his brow furrowed.

Seeing her sleeping peacefully, he felt annoyed for a moment, but also distracted.

Clicking his tongue lightly, Fernan took a quick look around the room. He didn't see anything particularly disruptive.

As he was prowling around, his gaze fell on the teacup on the table. He was getting even more speechless seeing that she even drank tea in that situation.

Fernan crossed his arms and stared at Julia’s pale face for a while.

Then, suddenly, he tilted his head lightly with a questionable look.

He didn't notice at first because of her shallow breathing, but her breathing was rather irregular. A cold sweat on her white forehead caught his eyes.

She was not just asleep. She was sick.

Fernan, who was pondering with an expressionless face, quickly slipped out of the bedroom.

****

Julia woke up slowly with a throbbing headache. Her blue eyes, half open, were dazed and wet.

She rolled over and crawled under the covers, her dazed eyes fluttering.

Then suddenly her eyes opened wide and she sat up quickly. It was because she realized that this was not her place.

"Are you up?"

A low voice sounded in her ears. Julia looked in the direction of the sound and opened her mouth slightly.

"… Your Highness?”

She caught sight of Fernan sitting in the recliner in front of the fireplace, looking at her.

She tried to remember what happened with a puzzled look on her face. Obviously, she was sitting on the couch, waiting for him to return. Then, she got a little sleepy and….

‘Did I just crawl into his bed in my sleep?’ Julia's lips quivered in panic.

"Your Highness, it's…"

"The physician said you’re sick.”

Intercepting her words, Fernan placed the papers in his hand on the table. His silent eyes, not a speck of light, slowly swept through her.

"Physician…?"

It was then that Julia was taken aback when she discovered the medicine on the small table.

She had been feeling sluggish for a long time, but she didn't think she was sick. Julia parted her lips cautiously.

"Um, thank you… His Highness called for the physician, didn't he?"

Fernan didn't reply, just thumped the handle on the side of his chair. Unsure of the meaning of the silence, Julia fidgeted awkwardly with the bed sheets.

Soon Fernan got up and walked to the bed. Standing with his back to the moonlight, he stared at Julia's face.

"Now tell me. What was your reason for sneaking into my room?"

"……what?" 

"I'm sure you didn't come here to demonstrate that you're sick.”

His shadow hung heavily over the bed. He frowned as if he was trying to see through Julia's intentions.

Julia flinched briefly at the chill and replied hesitatingly.

"Your Highness, I've been waiting to tell you something…"

Slurring her words, Julia immediately held her gaze which was being shaken.

She didn’t know why Fernan was being so cold to her, but she didn't want to shrink and become afraid of him.

Fernan lifted one eyebrow at the quiet voice. Julia clasped her hands tightly and continued speaking.

"I'm sorry I came in here without permission. But… Your Highness and I are married.”

"…"

"…I don't think you need to be so wary of me."

Her voice trembled slightly. Julia looked up at Fernan with a nervous face.

His face seemed to be slowly distorting, and soon a light sneer ran across his lips.

“Yes, you're right”

"…… Ah!"

He lightly pushed Julia's shoulders and laid her down on the bed. Leaning over the bed, Fernan whispered as he stared at her frozen body beneath him.

"Come to think of it, we haven't had our wedding night yet, have we?"

His long fingers grazed her hair and soon touched the front of her messy dress.

“If you wish, I can do it now.”

He slowly untied the silk ribbon at Julia's chest. His gaze remained fixed on her.

Julia held her breath and stared up at him as he got closer.

But she could not see any heat or desire in his face.

He wasn’t showing any momentary lust now, nor was he trying to do his duty as a husband.

It was just the obvious attitude of trying to find out her reaction.

Fernan, who was staring at the stiffened Julia, twisted one side of his mouth.

"I don't understand why you have that look. Isn't this what you wanted when you talked to me about being married?"

His cool voice, feigning kindness, seeped into Julia's ears.

His coldness chilled her all the way to the inside of her head.

"I just wanted to say something, that's all. I didn't come here hoping for something like this….."

Julia, who was murmuring embarrassingly, breathed out. Suddenly, a stabbing pain came in her head.

Her long eyelashes trembled as she gasped for breath.

Julia continued to speak through the pain.

“If you have time….. I want to ask if His Highness would like to visit my parents' house with me. From my mother, please…."

Her vision was blurry for a moment. The Fernan in her gaze was greatly perturbed.

Julia, who was looking up at him with blurry eyes, immediately pushed his solid chest out weakly.

Contrary to her expectation that he would not move slightly, he simply stood up. Soon the huge shadow that had surrounded her disappeared.

"I’ll be on my way…"

After lifting herself up and getting out of bed, Julia stumbled and fell on the carpet. It was difficult to keep her balance because of the headache.

She sighed heavily as she held her head up, and then she pushed with her hands on th floor to stand up.

Fernan, who had been staring at her up and down several times, frustratedly swept his hair.

Then he picked up Julia, who was sitting on the floor, at once.

"You stay here. I'll leave.”

In a somber voice, Fernan put Julia down on the bed, then stepped toward the door. Perhaps it was because her mind was wandering. Fernan’s face seemed somehow more subtle.

It was as if… he had made a mistake.

Julia gazed blankly at his back as he moved away, and soon closed her eyes.

***

The next afternoon, a rattling carriage pulled out of the palace.

Entering the city center, the carriage traveled along the square and soon entered the Mare district where the mansions were clustered. Julia looked out the window, basking in the warmth of the sun, and then turned her gaze to the other side.

In the seat in front of her, Fernan was sitting with his arms crossed and his eyes closed.

Julia looked at him for a moment with a confused expression.

In the morning, when she woke up in his bed, Julia remembered the previous day's troubles and was in a mixed mood.

When she came out of his bedroom in such a depressed mood, she heard Fernan’s words through his servant.

“Grand Duchess, His Highness said he would accompany you to see the Marquis after he finished his morning work.”

“His Highness said that?”

Julia couldn't help but be surprised. She didn’t expect him to do what she asked. She was forced to ask under pressure from the Marchioness, but unlike herself, Fernan had a tightly packed schedule. She was told that he had no time to rest during his stay in the capital due to the many meetings for the approaching Founding Day celebration Festival… but most importantly, he was so cold towards her yesterday. 

She was even a little confused why such a man made his time for her. Julia looked at him as if she were observing him, unable to hide her wonder.

At that moment, his eyes, which had been closed, slowly opened.

"Oh, I'm sorry."

Thinking that she had snooped, she apologized reflexively, but Fernan didn't say anything. After already making eye contact with her, he opened his mouth in a low voice.

"Is your body okay now?"

Julia, whose eyes widened, nodded blankly.

"…… Yes, I'm fine."

Fernan's gaze immediately dropped at her reply. The figure beside him, turning his head to look out the window, was as insensitive as usual.

But was it an illusion? Fernan seemed to care a little about her.

Julia lowered her head with a subtle expression and bit her lips slightly. She felt a little strange.