Hell's Handbook

Su Jin’s heart nearly stopped and the Mad Hatter raised an eyebrow. He owed Su Jin a huge favor, so if the Demon Lord was going to rob Su Jin of his body, he would have to use violence to prevent that from happening. At the same time, if he did manage to get Su Jin’s body back, he would have repaid Su Jin any favor he owed the young man.

Thankfully, the Demon Lord burst out laughing as well. “HAHA! Don’t be so nervous, young man, I’m just kidding. Besides… this body of yours isn’t really suitable for me.”

After that, the Demon Lord sauntered out of the front yard. A bright flash of lightning struck him the moment he set foot outside the yard but that didn’t stop the Demon Lord from continuing his way out. But by the time he had made it far enough from the yard, Su Jin’s body was black all over getting burned. It was as if he had been left inside an oven for too long.

“What the hell?! Look what you’ve done to my body! I’ve changed ethnicities at this rate,” yelled Su Jin’s soul angrily. If he went back looking like this, his teammates were going to laugh at how badly toasted he looked.

“Tsk, what are you afraid of? Your body is almost invincible now. It’s able to recover from such minor injuries instantly,” said the Demon Lord with a scoff. He shook himself gently and the blackened layer of skin fell right off, revealing a layer of smooth, new skin. Unfortunately, the lightning had also burned Su Jin’s clothes to ashes and that fell off as well.

Su Jin was very displeased with this situation, but he decided to let it go since the only people here were all male.

The Demon Lord was clearly very excited about leaving the house and yard behind, but he quickly chose to leave Su Jin’s body. To him, this body was just barely usable but very uncomfortable to remain in. It was like how uncomfortable it would be for someone at 1.8 meters tall to wear clothing meant for someone measuring only 1.5 meters.

Su Jin immediately returned to his body once the Demon Lord had left it. His psychokinesis allowed him to leave his body temporarily, but the longer he spent outside the body, the more dangerous his situation could become. If he left for too long, his body might die, or it might start to reject his spirit and turn him into a wandering ghost.

“Phew!” Su Jin let out a sigh of relief. Everything had happened quite quickly, but he was still worried inside. After all, the Mad Hatter had warned him before coming that the Demon Lord was an evil deity and might behave unreasonably.

The Demon Lord created a body for himself on the spot. He was a deity and was able to find some way to exist physically even without an actual body. Su Jin’s body had only been needed to get out of that house without injuring himself, that’s all.

But Su Jin got a shock when the Demon Lord created a body for himself, because the Demon Lord created a tall, busty female body with long black hair for himself.

“EH?!” Su Jin felt like there was someone strangling him as he choked in astonishment.

“What’s wrong?” asked the Demon Lord in a displeased voice when he noticed that Su Jin was staring strangely at him.

“You… didn’t say you were female,” said Su Jin awkwardly.

“Female? HAHA! It is foolish to view deities like human beings. I can turn into anything I want, but this was what I looked like before becoming a god, so I’m just used to it,” said the Demon Lord with contempt.

But Su Jin still felt really awkward, plus he didn’t have any clothes on right now. Then again, the Demon Lord had chosen to present herself as a woman before this, so it made sense that she was a woman to begin with.

Thankfully, the Mad Hatter had some sense and waved his hands to cover Su Jin with a similar suit to the one he was wearing. That resolved Su Jin’s awkwardness.

“Well, well, well. I’ve managed to break free from my shackles, but my strength hasn’t recovered fully yet, so I’ll stay with you for the time being,” the Demon Lord said to Su Jin.

“Why do you have to stay with me?!” Su Jin wasn’t very willing to take her in. She was a deity after all, so if she decided to do anything crazy, he wouldn’t be able to do anything about it at all.

The Mad Hatter threw the Demon Lord a glance, then snorted. “Besides going to your universe, she doesn’t have anywhere else to go, since she has to hide from the Handbook. Besides, the rest of us… don’t really like her.”

“Oh?” Su Jin asked curiously, “Why?”

“Because she’s an evil deity, a chaotic evil character. No matter which era you’re from, she’s definitely one whom everybody would get angry with and she’s not welcome anywhere. Would you believe me if I said she might suddenly feel like watching some fireworks and decided to just blast your universe to pieces?” The Mad Hatter had never been on good terms with the Demon Lord. If she hadn’t asked him for help first, he wouldn’t have wanted to work with her.

The Demon Lord wasn’t too offended and shrugged it off. “Don’t judge me based on who I used to be. It’s been such a long time and I’ve changed. Now… well, I’m still evil, but at least I’ve begun to understand the importance of keeping order. Back then, we lacked order and that’s how we were defeated by people like you. But hilariously, none of you ended up much better than us.”

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The Mad Hatter raised an eyebrow and Su Jin realized that the Mad Hatter was about to blow his top, so he quickly stood in between them and said, “Alright, alright, you can come and stay with me, but I want you to sign a contract to say that you will listen to everything I say when you’re living in my world.”

The Demon Lord glared at him, but he quickly added, “If you’re not agreeable to that, then you’ll have to take care of yourself. While it’s true that I would love for you to help me with rescuing my friend, I’m not going to risk my entire universe blowing up just to get your help.”

“Why, you!” The Demon Lord’s eyes bulged from how angry she was, but she eventually caved in and said, “Fine, I promise to listen to everything you say while I’m in your world.”

“Excellent! Let me help you two to set up the contract.” The Mad Hatter seemed very pleased to witness the Demon Lord having to eat humble pie. He gave a big wave and a silver magic circle appeared in the air.

“I just need you to beam a bit of your spirit into this and the contract will be complete,” said the Mad Hatter.

Su Jin sent a wisp of psychokinesis into the circle immediately. The Demon Lord was very reluctant but she didn’t have a choice and did the same. Once they had both done so, Su Jin could sense a mysterious force at the back of his mind.

“Great! Mad Hatter, please send us back,” Su Jin said to the Mad Hatter.

But the Demon Lord suddenly said, “Wait! You’re done but I’m not! Return my things to me?”

“Your things?” Su Jin was confused.

“Tsk, don’t play ignorant with me. The Demon Lord’s Bow and the Demon Lord’s Boning Knife are both items that I made. I lent them to you but I didn’t say I was giving them to you,” she reminded him.

Su Jin took them out immediately. These were items that could only be activated with Demon Lord Spirit Power, but he didn’t have any source of that now that she had taken back the Demon Lord’s Eye, so it was pointless keeping these items in his possession.

The Demon Lord took the Demon Lord’s Bow back, but hesitated when she looked at the boning knife. She sighed and said, “Forget it, I was interrupted at a crucial point in sharpening its blade, so it’s not suitable for me anymore. It’ll be better if I just made another one instead. You can have this.”

Su Jin stared at the knife in his hands and wasn’t sure what to do either. It was useless to him too. He didn’t have the right Spirit Power to activate its special skill, so it was just an extra sharp knife now.

The Mad Hatter took the knife from Su Jin and said with a smile, “You can’t use it to its fullest potential if it’s left like this, right? Those other gods owe you a favor, so I’ll get them to help you with this!”

Su Jin was a little surprised by the offer, but nodded anyway. The Mad Hatter had a lot of deities on his side, so it wouldn’t be too hard for them to do something about this knife and turn it back into a good weapon that he would be able to use.

The Mad Hatter kept the knife, then unleashed his unbridled power to pull open the sparkly black mist again. After they had made their way out of that world, the Demon Lord stood in the void for a while to look back at that tiny space she used to live in with a lost look in her eyes.

Back in Su Jin’s world, Kano Mai had just put the teapot down when the three of them suddenly appeared. She was a little surprised but remained unfazed. She got another cup and poured tea for all three of them.

The Demon Lord’s eyes widened when she saw Kano Mai and the Mad Hatter snorted. “Surprising, right?”

“Oh… very surprising,” she replied with a laugh. She then turned her attention back to Su Jin. “Where do I stay?”

“Where else? There are several rooms upstairs, pick anyone you like,” said Su Jin.

The Demon Lord frowned and huffed, “Where I used to live, every palace was an entire planet! I can’t believe you’re making me stay in such a tiny place.”

“Oh please! Where am I going to find you a planet? If you really want to, Mars isn’t very far from here, you can check it out yourself.” Su Jin was already getting a headache. This Demon Lord was definitely going to get into some sort of trouble at this rate.

The Mad Hatter bid Su Jin farewell and said, “I’ll come again after she’s recovered a bit more.”

Su Jin nodded and thanked him, “Thank you so much.”

“No need to thank me. You can save that for the time we rescue your friend.” The Mad Hatter grinned, then threw his hat in the air and leaped into it, leaving just one hand on the brim of the hat so that he could pull it in after him. The whole scene looked straight out of a cartoon.

The Demon Lord ended up living in Su Jin’s house just like that. She behaved like a queen around his house and berated Su Jin as and when she liked. But she was much friendlier toward Kano Mai.

Su Jin felt frustrated and gave Situ Jin a call. “Situ! Don’t visit me for the time being and don’t send anybody from the department or the Special Police. Don’t blame me if anyone ends up dead if you try!”

“Why do you say so?” Situ Jin couldn’t understand what was going on. He was now in the same team a Su Jin, so he helped to make sure that nobody gave Su Jin any trouble.

“I’ve got a guest and this person is very… formidable and unreasonable at the same time. I’m afraid that if this person discovers one of yours sneaking around the house, they’d end up getting killed,” said Su Jin frankly.

Situ Jin snorted. “Formidable? How formidable could this person be? The most formidable one in this country would be me, because I’ve got the power of the government behind me. Do you know the full identity of this person living with you? Would he be a threat to the people around you? I think it might be necessary to get him to register himself with the nearest Special Police department as soon as possible before we decide our next course of action.”

In response to Situ Jin’s domineering voice, Su Jin replied, “If you’ve got the guts, you can get her to register. I’ll just put it this way – this person is a real deity and one of the best in the universe. Also… she’s a deity from the evil side.”

DUU! Situ Jin immediately hung up on Su Jin, leaving Su Jin to wonder if he had merely imagined that phone call just now.