Diablo Destruction

Back at Lal's house, Lal was the only one in the hall. This guy was like an old dog that had lost its hair after being exposed to the scorching sun for a long time. He was limply slumping his whole body on the table, moaning half-deadly from time to time. , turned around and saw that Aunt Lisa's door was closed. It seemed that he had been doing useless work these days.

When he saw me coming in, he glanced weakly out of the corner of his eyes, and then he closed his eyes, sighing and frowning, looking like I was even more miserable than Yang Bailao.

I sent Sarah directly back to her room, covered myself with a quilt and fell asleep. Then I sat opposite Lar with a joking look on my face and looked at him with interest. I usually don’t have much interest, I just like to watch Reservoir Dogs. .

"Go, what are you looking at!" This old boy was in a bad mood, and when he saw that I was still giggling, he became angry.

"Hey, Mr. Lal, who we claim to be 'nothing needs to be reported to the family,' what else can trouble you?" I giggled and added to the trouble. Sure enough, a heavy sound came from Aunt Sarah's room. Crash.

"You bastard, you are just as bad as that bastard Doug!" Lar's eyes widened with anger, and he wanted to pounce on me and bite me. After a while, he lowered his head again in depression. I was not in a hurry. I poured a cup of tea by myself. Oops, I've been so tired from the old drunkard and old man Kane recently. It's rare to be able to relax like this.

"I said, Mr. Wu, look at how my Sarah can get along with Vilas without any problems. Is there any secret?" After a long time, Lal, who was lying on the table dead, seemed to have suddenly thought of something, and looked at me with bright eyes. , she knew her daughter's character very well, even though she seemed well-behaved and obedient, she seemed to be easy to deal with. But in fact, he has the same personality as his mother - he is very possessive in his bones. This boy Wu was able to tame her into a submissive one. If he could also teach himself how to do it, wouldn't it be easy for Sari to solve it?

"There's only one thing." I took a sip of tea. This guy really thought I was a lover. I'm also worried about my relationship right now.

"What can I do?" Lal jumped up excitedly, looking at you, you had the nerve to say you were not a henpecker. I gave him a look of disdain.

"It's very simple. You have to have a correct vision. You must understand the essence of the other person before getting married."

"Isn't this nonsense?" Lars, who was overjoyed and devastated, immediately threw the dirty rag on the table towards me, lay weakly on the table, and muttered in a low voice: "Actually, before we got married, the sari was still a She is a very docile and cute girl. Who knew she would turn into a tigress? You can’t blame me for this..."

sweat. Now it was my turn to start sweating coldly. Will Sarah and Vilas be like that in the future?

Just as the two of them fell into a speechless silence, a thunderous voice came from outside the door.

"Brother, I'm here to eat. It's his fault. I'm starving to death." In ancient and modern times, the only person who can be so confident about eating is probably Doug.

Sure enough, the door opened. It was Doug and Geoff, both of them looked a little downcast. Needless to say, Geoff, anyone with a bit of shame would probably be upset when Doug did that embarrassing act. As for Doug, well, he must have been punished. Crap. After all, there are not many nouveau riche like me.

"Hey, Doug, how much did you get fined by the bar?" I mercilessly touched the scar that was still bleeding.

"Damn it, 286 gold coins, just a rotten table, those vampires!!" Sure enough, when he mentioned this, Doug's already ugly face suddenly darkened.

"Not much anymore. I spent more than 20,000 gold coins back then." I sighed with emotion. Every time I recall it, my heart feels like a knife. More than 20,000 gold coins, even if they are exchanged for broken gems. There is also a small bag of twenty pills inside.

After hearing what I said, Doug immediately found his psychological balance and became happy. Why am I surrounded by a bunch of bastards who base their happiness on the pain of others?

"Sister-in-law, I'm hungry. Do you have anything good to eat?" Doug looked around and saw that Aunt Sari was not here, so he asked loudly.

"Go find Wu, he probably has delicious food there." Aunt Sari's voice came from the room.

Huh? I? I was stunned. Could it be that Aunt Sari...

"By the way, sister-in-law, I really forgot about it. I heard that you went to Lu Gaoyin and brought back a lot of good things. You must have not forgotten our place." Doug immediately focused his gaze. Locked on me, not to mention him, even Lal and Gefu were in a daze. If Lu Gaoyin is compared to a metropolis, then Rogge camp is undoubtedly a poor village. This new thing in the city is very important to Lal. These bumpkins are still very attractive.

"Of course I won't forget your share. Who do you think we are good brothers?" I immediately narrowed my eyes. You three are actively seeking death. So don't blame me for being cruel.

"Could it be those crippled monster carvings, Andariel's tentacles or something like that again?" Lal suddenly remembered the strange gift he received from me last time, and immediately looked at me warily.

"No, no, this time it's something more affordable. As Aunt Sari said, it's some very 'exotic' food." I laughed even harder, Aunt Lisa, my conscience is really bad, but I like it.

"Oh! That feeling is so good. Damn it, when I woke up, I was dragged away by those bastards without even thinking about food." Doug, who was already dizzy with hunger, became excited. It was obvious that He didn't notice the word "peculiar" that I specially emphasized, and after his interruption, Lal and Gefu seemed to ignore it. Very good, you will die without injustice.

I took out three loaves from the inventory with a smile. I bought them after finding n stalls in the market. They were very "creative" loaves, full of novelty.

Do not believe? Take a look at my left hand first. At first glance, it’s nothing special. It’s just a few extra red claws and a pair of tongs on the ordinary sesame bread. Only by cutting it horizontally in the middle can you see the baker’s hand. Uniquely - there is a crab wrapped in the bread. The crab is so complete that even the shell has not been removed. Look at its four pairs of sound claws and powerful pair of pincers. There is no doubt that this is a very healthy big crab. The most important thing is that it is an unprocessed crab without any preservatives. The green and natural live crab, when you first buy it, its claws and pincers are still squirming. The biggest selling point of this bread is that when you put it on the ground, you will be shocked to find that this bread can actually walk sideways! It can be said to be a combination of food and entertainment.

Look at the one on my right hand. It doesn’t look special at first glance. It doesn’t even have the most basic claws and pliers. Only after breaking the bread in half can you discover the hidden meaning inside it. That’s right. This is a bread with a pit, and it is not an ordinary pit. It is taken from a very precious luminous oval-shaped fish 20,000 meters below the seabed of the Twin Sea. The pit inside is made of this fish - the internal organs - The part closest to the anus is made with complete care. With good intentions, there is no doubt that this product is a natural food without any processing, so please feel free to eat it.

The last piece of bread I put on the table. It's a bit more curious than the first two. When I first saw it, I thought it was a hot dog, but when I took a closer look, I found that there were some differences in the details - the two outer slices of bread were round and small, and they probably looked like hot dogs. In the shape of an egg, a hot dog sandwiched between, no. That's not sausage. The baker told me that this thing has a great origin. It is taken from the giant deep-sea turtle that is 50,000 meters below the sea and only comes to the surface to lay eggs once every 50 years. The turtle's head will be chopped off. Less than half a quarter of an hour later, the head of the turtle, which was still bleeding, was stuck in the middle of two pieces of spherical bread. This was considered done. Sure enough it is. Ahem, that’s profound...

Look at the three loaves of bread placed on the table. The three of them looked at each other, and even Doug, who looked like he was reincarnated as a starving ghost, restrained himself from taking action immediately.

"My dear Wu, can you tell me, are these breads really edible?" Lal asked cautiously. Sari had not cooked at all in the past few days, and he was starving now.

"Of course." I said plausibly: "Though these breads look ugly, let me tell you, the ingredients in them are seafood. Do you understand seafood?"

"Oh!!" When they heard the word "seafood", the three of them couldn't help but trembled and shouted in surprise. They suddenly had more confidence in these three breads. This seafood is very important to Rogge Camp located in the Sea of ​​Prairie. But adding these two words to the precious ingredients that cannot be bought even if you have money is like saying to a poor kid who has never stepped out of the mountains, "This is a product from the city, it is easy to use." It's no wonder that Lal and the others don't believe it.

"But, it seems to taste a bit weird." Gefu, who was always cautious, pinched his nose and said a little worriedly.

"This seafood smells like that. It doesn't smell good, but tastes just delicious." I almost convulsed with laughter, but I said seriously on my face.

Of course it has taste. Do you think this raw seafood that has been stored for more than 20 days can have no taste?

Another sentence of "city goods" finally defeated Lal and the others' last line of defense. The three of them looked at each other intriguedly. On both sides, Lal and Doug took the lead in attacking, taking the relatively normal-looking crab bread and fish. With the bread in his hand, the lagging Gefu had no choice but to choose turtle bread. The honest man really suffered a loss.

I sighed for a while and watched them each put the bread into their mouths. I felt that they were so pitiful, so...

"Wait!!" I stopped them decisively: "This bread is delicious, but don't you think something is missing?"

The three of them stopped, and they all showed an open-minded look.

"Yes, that's it, jam!!!" I suddenly raised a bottle of golden jam high and said decisively.

"Oh, this jam is a golden color that I have never seen before!" "Lu Gaoyin's stuff is really extraordinary!" "Just by looking at the golden color, I can tell that it must taste very good." Three People gathered around the jam and marveled at it, expressing their inner feelings one after another.

"Bread without jam is like a fallen devil without a small knife, Andariel without tentacles, and Diavolo who can't play with fire. They are completely unqualified bread gourmets. Come on, without further ado, I'll help. Just smear it on." As I said this, I used a spoon to smear the bread both inside and out. The bread, which shone with gold, was like the highest-grade caviar. The light color could make People salivate.

"Then we're welcome." Seduced by the appearance, the three of them didn't care about the jam in their hands. They just grabbed the bread and took a big bite. I, on the other hand, had already walked out of the door and sighed. It’s not that I don’t want to see it, it’s that I can’t bear it.

"Ah~~~~!"

Today is an unforgettable day for all Rogge residents, because on this day, the most piercing and desperate screams in history echoed over the camp!

When I opened the door again and walked inside, the entire hall was in a mess, like a murder scene. Three half-bitten loaves of bread were scattered on the ground with golden jam flowing on them. Correspondingly, there were three "corpses" , no, it cannot be said to be a corpse.

Doug, an old man, was lying on the ground with his hands close to his body. His whole body was arched and taut, and he was constantly tossing and bouncing with the strength of his waist. His cheeks opened and closed, like a fish that accidentally jumped onto the shore, and was constantly jumping. The struggling, living fish, it goes without saying what kind of bread he ate.

Lal, on the other hand, stood in a horse stance, with his hands clenched, foaming at the mouth, his eyes rolling up and down, walking sideways, humming, how does crab bread taste?

Poor Geoff, lying motionless on the ground, oh my God, could he have died heroically? There is another honest person missing in this world, but when I looked closer, I found that this guy was practicing Turtle Breath.

It wasn't until night that these three poor guys woke up. Naturally, I was inevitably taught a lesson by them. I was caught by the three of them, gagged, and hung upside down to a tree for a whole night. In fact, I was not the culprit. It's Aunt Sari, I just added a little fire. Looking at the warm firelight in the room and the faint sound of chewing, I just felt that the wind was cooler tonight and I felt hungrier.

Afterwards, the cold war between Aunt Sari and Lal finally came to an end. This can fully prove that Aunt Sari did deliberately vent her anger at that time. However, how to explain such a thing? Who told me to laugh the most happily at that time.

The days passed like this, either being tied to the training ground by the old drunkard, or being dragged by Kane to test paper, or kidnapping Sarah, taking Willas to play with him, bickering with the little ghost in his spare time, until I listened to Doug's nonsense in the bar, and then watched groups of adventure teams leaving, and welcomed groups of adventurers back. It has been nearly a month since Lal and the others came back. In the evening, I just came out of the training ground sweating profusely. When I came out, I heard the news that Warev's convoy had returned.