Autopsy of a Mind

'Save me,' I screamed in my head. 

I poked his arm several times, hoping to catch his attention. He didn't wake up. My eyes never left the figure at the door, staring at it intently as I tried to shake Sebastian awake. 

I gave up pretty quickly, resorting to pulling the cover over my head and remaining under the covers until I felt the heat overcome me. Something dipped down on the bed near my feet and I froze. If I could stop breathing, I would. If I could rip the covers off and face the shadow at the bed, I would. But I was too scared. 

For someone who was not easily scared, my demons gripped me with fear so acute that it paralyzed me. It hovered over me, breathing down on me. I felt a sob rip through me and I shuddered as I tried to figure out what to do. 

I had only one option, wait until the sun rose and this thing disappeared. It felt like a lifetime before I felt Sebastian stirring beside me. He jumped into action, ripping the cover off me. I could see his face hovering over mine, illuminated by the dim light. 

"Evie," he whispered, his cold hands touching the skin of my face. Electrified, I stared at him, unable to move. He saw something in my eyes that moved him. His touch became softer and his voice smoother. 

"Listen to me. You're trapped in your body. Slowly breathe according to my instruction." I followed blindly, my eyes locked on his lips, my ears only for his voice. As I breathed, I felt the panic recede. The tears still poured out but my heart felt lighter. His hand was on my neck, pressed against my jugular as he took my pulse. Once he was satisfied with my heart rate, he started another set of instructions.

"Focus on the tip of your toes. Now, slowly try to move it." He waited, his eyes flickering to my toes. "Very good, now let the feeling of controlling your body and being able to move it slowly rise up your legs." His voice was soothing and his words easy to follow. 

I don't know how long it took but finally, I escaped the prison I never knew I was in. 

I gasped when I felt my voice return. 

"You're okay, Evie," he reassured me.

"I called you. I shook you. You didn't wake up." His eyes stiffened slightly and he nodded, the emotion leaving instantly before I could understand what he was thinking. 

"I'm sorry, Evie. I'll explain everything to you once you calm down." It took a while but I nodded. He slid his hand under my neck and pulled me up gently, making me sit up. Next, he moved out of the bed and took my hand into his.

He returned with a clear glass filled with warm milk. As I pressed my palms to surround it, I felt my body become warm. 

"Sip on it slowly and tell me what you saw." I nodded. I took a small sip, testing the temperature. When I was satisfied, I took a bigger sip. 

"I saw a tall man at the door, shrouded in darkness," I admitted, embarrassed. 

"Don't be embarrassed," he assured. "Tell me more. How did he look? Have you seen him before?"

"I have," I nodded. I gave him the distinguishing features and Sebastian grimaced. "What is wrong with me?"

"Do you want to purify your home? We could call a priest or something..." he asked nervously, his eyes flickering to her face. 

"I know you don't believe in the supernatural. Neither do I. Tell me what I am seeing. I need the science behind it." I urged him to reveal the truth. 

He sighed. "This figure is a recurring theme in a lot of studies. A lot of people across the globe have claimed to see this man in windows and doors, lurking in the shadows. Despite studies, we don't have a conclusive answer why it is this figure that people see, but it can be said that the mysterious background and nature of the brain making anthropomorphic images out of shadows has led to the creation of this figure in the collective consciousness." He paused to check her reaction. "Your brain is powerful, Evie, and it tries to make out things you can make sense out of in the darkness. Because of your hypervigilance, you expect to see something in the shadows, and therefore see something in the shadows when the lights turn off."

"Then why did I start seeing it only after you fell asleep?" I asked, utterly confused. 

"Because when I was beside you, you had a sense of comfort. When I fell asleep, you felt alone and vulnerable and your brain used that fear to conjure up the image. Your body fell asleep, Evie, but your eyes were still open. You were lucid dreaming and had a case of sleep paralysis along with it."

"Is that normal?" Sebastian nodded vehemently. 

"It is very common. Remember what I taught you. Remember that you were not able to move and when you thought you called me, you actually didn't. I will wake up when I think something is wrong with you, Evie. When I felt your sob, I woke up instantly. I am a light sleeper and I can take care of you." He stroked her head in reassurance. 

"Will this never go away?" My voice was small and full of fear. 

"You've lived with this for six years, Evie. Now that you are talking about it, Dr. Knight and I will help you. The routine given to you was to regulate your body. It's your first day, so your body is not used to the ritual. It fell asleep without your brain realizing that it was time to shut off as well. Once they get into sync, you'll be able to fall asleep."

I drank the glass of milk and scrubbed my face. 

"I need to write this down, right?" Sebastian nodded. 

"Don't spare any details. We'll continue tracking your sleep and dreams for the next couple of months until you can sleep completely. After that, I can move out of your bed and sleep in the living room. Slowly wean you off," he offered.

"You're doing too much for me."

"Do you want to repay me for it?" he asked with a sly smile. 

"No. I don't owe you for it. You denied me when I asked you and then slid into my apartment of your own accord. That means you are injecting yourself in my life without prompting, so I won't be grateful to you and offer repayment." I smiled, not giving him the chance to act narcissistically. 

"Well, I was going to ask you to work harder," he shrugged. 

"I'm dedicated. You don't need to be a slave driver," I retorted. "Also, I believe in working smarter, not harder."

"As expected from my assistant. I chose well." I was sure there was no way to reduce his love for himself. It was impossible. But I had to admit, it was one of his charming qualities. He couldn't stop at being proud of himself, he had to include her in the mix, as well. Truly an interesting way of viewing people. 

"Should we go back to sleep?" I asked. The curtains were drawn so I didn't know the time. 

"No need," he flicked his wrist to reveal his watch. "It's dawn. You didn't realize how much time passed." He gave her a warm smile. "I'll make us some breakfast and then we can head to the police station to get more information on the Magician case, okay?"

"You're cooking?" I was beyond surprised. After we shifted, he hadn't cooked. He had fully used her mediocre cooking techniques and benefitted. 

"Yes," he answered. He walked to the kitchen and put on the apron. Very cute, I thought to myself. "You've already had the milk, so I will make something nutritious for you." He got busy in the kitchen and I went back to the bedroom to make the bed.

Once, everything was settled, I came out and sat down to have breakfast. We ate silently and I basked in how delicious the food tasted. It was indeed better than mine. I quickly realized that my praise and respect for his superiority had fed his narcissism. But also, I couldn't not respect him for his competence. 

Even Sheng Sheng had a place beside their feed, licking at the milk in the small bowl. 

"Prepare the psychological profile along the lines of what we discussed yesterday. I'll add in some things and present them to the police force. With the behavioral studies department with us, it should be a great experience. We can compare notes."

I nodded. I recalled the conversation and made notes on what I would need to add. 

"I'll show you a draft before the presentation," I told him. 

"No need. I trust you." The rest of the meal continued in silence, yet again.